Like a lot of people — entrepreneurial and Type A people, in particular — I’ve fallen victim to the romanticism of DOING ALL THE THINGS. Yes, I can absolutely work a full-time job, manage a household, be a good wife/daughter/friend, grow my author business, exercise four times a week, and pursue other personal goals all at once. And yes, that does make me something of a super-human. Yay me!
Imagine my surprise when I finally figured out what’s been bothering me since December… I’ve burnt out. Hard. Bad. And I didn’t even realize it until February.
In spite of all logic, I’m still allured by the “do-it-all” mentality. I believe that it genuinely works for some people (all the indie publishing podcasts are full of brilliant examples of that), and it has worked for me at certain points in my life. But it doesn’t work anymore… at least it doesn’t right now.
At this point, I feel like I’m only able to do a select few things well. Ironically, these are aspects of my life I’ve struggled with for… well, my whole life. They’re also areas of personal improvement, which act as the foundation for my intellectual and creative goals. Exercising? Doing it and loving it! Meeting my daily step goal? Yes, sir, Mr. FitBit overlord! Reading a book a week? Easy peasy!
As for my other goals, they’re not going quite as well. I’ve come to two options about this. 1) I can accept this and focus on making even more progress where I’m currently rocking it OR 2) I can re-evaluate my goals and routine to achieve a better balance. I have a lot of thinking to do about what these goals mean and the larger implications for my present situation and potential future. In another twist of irony, I think I’ve reached my “quarter-life crisis” a year late!
Even though this year is off to an unexpected, weirdly existential beginning, I’m excited for March. It’s my birthday month, and I’m spending a week of it at home in Kansas. I’m hoping a little “vacation” and surrounding myself with loved ones will help me sort through some of these lingering issues. If nothing else, it will be wonderful to see my family and celebrate year 26.
Before I ramble anymore and turn this into a full-on journal entry, here’s a look back at my February.
Due to focusing on personal goals, I didn’t make as much writing progress as I’d hoped. I did write a new short story, though I’m not at a place to explain why or share it with you all yet. However, Camp NaNoWriMo is on the horizon, and I plan to participate this April. It’s been a good way to jumpstart my writing in the past, so hopefully it helps this year too!
Ask Me Anything Videos I recorded the February AMA, and you can watch it here. The video reveals the main character of Desertera #4, as well as some of my top writing tips and book recommendations.
Parallel Magic Podcast The podcast is still going strong! Jonas and I released two episodes this month, discussing Illuminae by Amie Kaufman and Jay Kristoff and A Wrinkle in Time by Madeleine L’Engle. Check it out here.
The Making of Salem by Robin Derosa 3/5 stars — An interesting examination of how the events of the Salem Witchcraft Trials have been portrayed in historical texts, literature, film, and the tourism industry.
Under Stone by Helen Jones 5/5 stars — The fourth book in the Ambeth Chronicles. Alma’s journey is nearing its end, but the palace intrigue and scheming has reached an all-time high!
A Wrinkle in Time by Madeleine L’Engle 4/5 stars — Finally reach the children’s classic, but wish I would have done so as a child. Charming and imaginative, but Meg drove me nuts!
The Book of Imaginary Beings by Jorge Luis Borges 5/5 stars — A cool “coffee table book” with short entries on monsters and creatures from around the world. Fun and quick read.
A History of Vampires in New England by Thomas D’Agostino 4/5 stars — Explains how myths of vampires started with tuberculosis and dives into several historical accounts of vampire exorcisms. So interesting!
Ready Player One by Ernest Cline 5/5 stars — A fun race for the ultimate prize through an awesome virtual reality world. Lots of spunk, a little bit of danger, and more 80s references than you’ll ever want or need.
Physical health Crushing it! My FitBit keeps me accountable for my daily step goals, and I’ve found these great YouTube videos with exercises I can do anywhere.
Mental health I’ve been under a lot of stress at work, as well as self-imposed stress from my goals and the feeling that I’m “not doing enough.” But keeping with my daily meditation breaks, as well as treating myself to a little video game escapism, has helped me recharge and de-stress.
Honestly, I don’t want to add anymore pressure to myself for March. My mission is to enjoy my birthday and spend good quality time with my family, friends, and pets while I’m in Kansas. There’s nothing so pressing that I have to do it now, and I need to focus on recharging and getting over this burn out.
What did you accomplish in February? What are your March goals? Share in the comments!